i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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