he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
