she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
you would pick up someone in the library
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
