Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
