What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
