Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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