i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
