According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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