if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Randomize
