in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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