so explain again why im purple
no
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
