Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
