P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
