my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
There was a lot of him and a little penis
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
