Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
She needs sedatives and a leash
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
