You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
