i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
