She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
