Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
