i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
