dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
its not stalking. its research.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
the day after is always just damage control
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
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