you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
We are two peas in an std pod
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
