I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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