that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
