haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize