Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I need water and some morals
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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