I think i sorta joined a cult last night
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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