highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
