My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
