your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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