She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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