did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Randomize
