I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
