Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Randomize
