Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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