He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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