I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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