Is it normal to miss your booty call?
This is not my ceiling
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
