So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize