Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
i came on her dog
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize