it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize
