Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
