Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
