Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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