I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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