I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
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