she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
