I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Randomize
