out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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