Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
